|| The Unthinkable
Today I feel hopeful.
I feel hopeful about many things.
I have finally revived the love of my youth.
Though I have put you away for many years, I remember the joy I once had when I first picked you up.
I studied you and made time for you.
You were not people’s first option,
Yet quite secretly I always still liked you.
There were many a days that were quite rough and really daunting, yet somehow I stuck with you and we made it through.
I have seen highs with you and lows.
We celebrated together the things that we were able to do.
But like any love, a time came when I saw your ending.
I thought to myself, what good was it if no one else could see the value in all that I saw in you. I started to take you for granted, then with you, I parted ways.
But I had lost a great love. I entered my mourning state. For now, all I could see were missed moments with you. There was nothing more that I thought about than all the “could be” moments with you. I missed you for a long time. Then I eventually resented myself for the thought of abandoning you in the first place.
Then fear grew on me. I feared for a while that I would lose my appetite if ever I thought of returning.
After all, I did not for a moment, want to lose that sweet taste of memories that we both shared.
I tried wiping away any thoughts of returning. Yet you still captivated my thoughts in the very dreams I would dream. There was no escaping.
So, now I come face to face with you.
Now all the old feelings come rushing in.
And it gladdens the heart.
You have given me renewed hope. For now, I have new sight. Never again will I take you for granted, for you have already shown much to me. Now, I take it my duty to not bury your great beauties but to bring out and reveal the many hidden treasures and wonders that you revealed to me. You have given me great purpose.
06.06.23
I feel hopeful about many things.
I have finally revived the love of my youth.
Though I have put you away for many years, I remember the joy I once had when I first picked you up.
I studied you and made time for you.
You were not people’s first option,
Yet quite secretly I always still liked you.
There were many a days that were quite rough and really daunting, yet somehow I stuck with you and we made it through.
I have seen highs with you and lows.
We celebrated together the things that we were able to do.
But like any love, a time came when I saw your ending.
I thought to myself, what good was it if no one else could see the value in all that I saw in you. I started to take you for granted, then with you, I parted ways.
But I had lost a great love. I entered my mourning state. For now, all I could see were missed moments with you. There was nothing more that I thought about than all the “could be” moments with you. I missed you for a long time. Then I eventually resented myself for the thought of abandoning you in the first place.
Then fear grew on me. I feared for a while that I would lose my appetite if ever I thought of returning.
After all, I did not for a moment, want to lose that sweet taste of memories that we both shared.
I tried wiping away any thoughts of returning. Yet you still captivated my thoughts in the very dreams I would dream. There was no escaping.
So, now I come face to face with you.
Now all the old feelings come rushing in.
And it gladdens the heart.
You have given me renewed hope. For now, I have new sight. Never again will I take you for granted, for you have already shown much to me. Now, I take it my duty to not bury your great beauties but to bring out and reveal the many hidden treasures and wonders that you revealed to me. You have given me great purpose.
06.06.23